Take me as I am for I come as I stand

On one part, we want to believe,

we want to step into it as an easy and simple game.

We want to make a decision weather we are stepping into it at all.

We fool ourselveimagess into believeing it can be a practical decision with a cup of coffee in one hand and a smart phone in the other.

We sit there and we base our decision on bad experiences and fears

And THEN we think we make a pragmatic choise.

So we want to believe.

Brick on brick and you have a house.

Human to human and you have a couple. Add some chemistry to it and it will work. Brick to brick with some cement inbetween.


So on the other hand, if we step into it, we take the brick on brick approach and if something breaks, we put the coffee and the smartphone down and…we run away. Oh wait. We keep our fancy iPhone6 in hand and get a new coffee on the run.

We do not believe in correction. Two layers of brick and the new house, a better one with more belief must be started.

When do we know we are out of energy, coffe and cement to try and take the bad brick out and put a new in? Or look for a new kind of cement?

I come as I stand. I and even lovely you to whom I can give my immediate energy for a day or two… maybe even a week or three…CANNOT deconstruct me and take the pieces that fit onto your pieces.

You cannot expect me to come in a full sparkling package in the time of the day or seazon of the year which suits you the best.

Your fears do not put you in a more delicate position to which one must adjust, because your fears stem from the same root as my fears and his and hers fears…


I come in full. I leave in full. A piece that can be detached from me and left in your hands is a worthless piece. It is not me any longer.

I come as I stand. As ambiguous and ambivalent as a human being can be.

I take strength and power from Faust and Mandela, yet I have the ability to loose my sanity, senses and grib as a mother who just lost her child. Take me as I am or leave me as I come.

Take me today and you still might not have me tomorrow. Take me tomorrow and I might have not been yours today. The reality is in NOW. The future is never.

The fears guide the future which will never be. The fears make us loose the now and the now might not repeat itself tomorrow.

I come in full. I come as I stand. To you and to him and to her and to life and to ungraspable terms like home, city or country. I come as I know it. I give what I can and ask nothing in return. I ask nothing but n o w.


You ask me, what is God, I tell you it is energy. You take my hand and you feel the god. He takes my hand and there is nothing but the cold blood. God is in now, god is in no fear and no looking back. God is giving my now into your hands and asking to watch it as if it was tiny grains of fine sand and they are being blown out of your palms. It is now that you feel me and when the sand is gone. Now will be different. We will handle it when the different now is in your hands again. sand

You want to believe you make a choise. There are no choises with energy. There are no choises with god. There are no choises with the fine sand in your palms. Even if the sand it is not there the feeling will haunt you as if it was now.

Do not make a choice. Take now. The life will flow through you. Resisting the flow will just make the now and the sand more scary and less fine…http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdJtJSx5QTA


Komentarų: 1

  1. heavy duty said,

    lapkričio 1, 2014 00:00

    Shit, how deep! Now look what have you done. You made me cry. Damn you girl.

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